December 5, 2024

wook wranglers

Online magazine devoted to music festivals, lifestyles, fusion recipes, original art and all manner of wookish delights.

The Major Malfunktion Music and Artisan Festival “23: Lineup and Schedule

Please find your way to your seats. The program is about to begin. Turn your phones to silent and refrain from all flash photography. Anyone who does not comply will get shut down like a bad daycare. This is the tour that time forgot and through it all, the wranglers will be closing out the mountain festival season in Virginia of all places and why not, it’s for thugs you know. Welcome to the The Major Malfunktion Music and Artisan Festival “23: Lineup and Schedule.

The Major Malfunktion Music and Artisan Festival will be held on Oct 6th-8th, 2023 at the Mountain Valley Artisan Barn in Axton, Virginia. There will be 16 bands, 3 DJs and acoustic support between sets. Ticket price includes camping, parking, two free meals and a Saturday happy hour.

Artists include The Kind Thieves, Sexbruise?, Dr. Bacon, Kentucky Ruckus, War Chile, The Mighty Good Times, Dock Street Pocket, Road Soda, Charissa Joy and the High Frequency, The Sweet Life, Liv Sloan and the Die Hards, Matt Red Moore Band, The Sweet Life, Atlantic Aesthetic, Dr. Psilicon, ‘Goo Balls’, Spliff Business, Ravida and Asstetic, Jake Retting & G, Amber Collier, Kamp Happiness Family Band, and more.

Major Malfunktion 2022. Photo by Cloud Bobby.
Honest trading at Major Malfunktion 2022. Photo by Cloud Bobby.

Kamp Happiness Takeover. Find your way to the Hobo Kamp renegade set for a heaping pot of campfire music, arts and crafts, body painting, face glitter, experimental drugs and medicinal leeches. All included with the price of admission. Stay late for the Circle K? trading post and interactive demensional scavenger hunt. Won’t that be fun. Turn that frown upside down.

Kentucky Ruckus and Friends Sunday staff party will be $5 at the door for all patrons. Their sound is founded on their genetic and musical inseparability catapulted by the raw energy and pure rowdiness of their live performance. Don’t sleep on this one.

 

Mountain Valley Artisan Barn is located at 1215 Collins Road, Axton, VA, United States, Virginia Tickets can be found here and weekend passes are available as well. Children under twelve are free.

The Bacon and the Bruise in the same show? Well just take my pesos. More fun than a frog in a glass of milk. The Sunday ‘Goo Balls’ set will also be their debut show so don’t miss out. Get ready for plenty of artists, vending and food for everyone.  

Brian Grey from War Chile. Major Malfunktion. Photo by Cloud Bobby, 2022.

Non-negiables for this year’s Malfunktion menu:

For goodness’ sake don’t miss…

  • Lucienda Rosalita’s homemade and unfinished poke and stick Tattooz Parlour
  • Four-day Old Brie’s infamous Tassel Spectacular
  • Drunkle Cleophus’ megaphone sponsored sunrise sermon
  • The Rusty Nail chemical toilet human test kit
  • “Homeless Person or Stagehand” The Game
  • Baby Shawn’s leftover frozen food from Dollar Tree stone soup, buffet/trough
  • Boston’s Interracial Cream Pie Struggle Puddle
  • Anus Recharging Station
  • Kamp Happiness Family Jam at the Malfunktion Junktion
  • Virginia Dry Wall Scavenger Hunt
  • and so much more…

Just two weeks after Major Malfunktion, the mother ship of all Florida hippy parties, Hulaween lands on the face of your face in Live Oak. Join the Kamp Happiness adventure as they make every effort to simultaneously offend and be offended. Keep up with the wranglers as we head north to Elements Music and Arts Festival and Secret Dreams. ooh la la.